Day One And Done

Finished my first of 6 rounds of chemo. 5 left. This one was a bit longer. I was there from 9 til about 4 because they have to administer some of the drugs super slow the first time. I didn't have any reactions, thank god. They gave me some Benadryl through my IV in case I had an allergic reaction, and wouldn't you know it, that's what made me feel the loopiest. I got crazy tired and then crazy anxious. I took an Ativan and it all calmed down. I had John by my side the whole time. We played Scrabble and watched Friends and Seinfeld and ordered lunch. I am not looking forward to how I am going to feel this weekend but at least I have one under my belt.

It's A Black Fly In Your Chardonnay

As I was drawing on my eyebrows today, I noticed they look a bit thicker. They look like they are coming back. How ironic, seeing as how I am probably going to lose them in a few weeks.

A Letter To Breast Cancer

Dear BC (we are tight enough now, that I feel I can call you BC),

If you don't stop stalking my life on the boardwalk, I am going to have to get a restraining order.

Best,
Stacey

The Cancer Came Back The Very Next Day

I am sure you have all heard that my breast cancer came back. Thankfully it has not spread. But I do have to go through another round of chemo and now I need a mastectomy. For about a week I was in shock. I was without words. I sat in my room and cried and hated life. Then I went back into fighter mode. I already had my port put back in my arm (which wasn't nearly as painful or scary as the first time) and I start chemo Thursday. It will be the same 2 drugs (Taxotere and Cytoxan) plus 2 additional drugs, which aren't technically chemo drugs and have very minimal side effects, if any. I will lose my hair again and already have a sassy wig.  I am ready to do this and get through it like a champ. In trying to look at the light at the end of the tunnel, I am excited I will have 2 brand new boobs. Mine are so disfigured and not me anymore. And truth be told, it will be kinda fun to have fake knockers. But that's not until at least October. One day at a time. Right now I am focusing on getting through chemo. My only regret right now is that I had a lumpectomy instead of a mastectomy the first time around. There is a good chance I wouldn't be going through this a second time had I opted for the mastectomy. Lesson learned

ER (Not the Popular TV Show)

I landed myself in the ER last night, folks. Good times. I was super nauseous and pukey and had a bit of a fever and my surgeon wanted me to go to the ER and get hydrated. I got there and they told me it was a 3-4 hour wait. I told them I couldn't wait that long. They looked at my chart and saw my cancer history and bumped me up to the top of the list. 5 minutes later I was in a room. They put an IV in and gave me fluids, anti-nausea meds and a painkiller. They did bloodwork and a urine test and an X-ray  and it all looked fine. Once the anti-nausea meds kicked in, I was good to go home. I was there for 4 hours total. John sat in the room with me the whole time. It wasn't fun and it was 100 times worse than chemo. I feel better today. Not 100% but much better. I'm able to keep food down. I can't wait for the day when I am totally back to normal :)

Just A Lil Surgery

I had to have minor surgery yesterday. I got an infection from radiation that caused and abscess on my breast. It hurt and it looked disgusting and I was a Debbie Downer for about 3 weeks.  The procedure was quick and my surgeon is an amazing woman. Now I am recovering and in pain but nothing a little Vicodin can't help :) I'm ready to feel like a normal girl again!